Work as worship

I am a first year medical student. Medicine was not quite the plan i had in mind. If I had a plan, it was never to be as busy with work as my parents. Simply my plan was not God's, but His is and will be the best, because it is His.




My first semester exams are now completed. Christmas was filled with revision and recall, revision, recall, reading, revision, recall, reading. If you'd enter my room you may well have thought i'd gone mad. You may have heard me repeat things aloud, throw a tennis ball back and forth quoting the facts and info.  I did not plan to do medicine, and i did not have a plan for how i would get through all the work. Each time i set a goal i went passed the time allocated. So i stopped planning. I was overwhelmed by the amount of information I needed to remember. The i cannot do this, i am going to fail mentality began. I got frustrated when i couldn't recall everything form the topics i had revised multiple times, and even more frustrated when i looked at how much i still had to cover.

A gift I was given shortly after I was born

This plaque hangs just above my bed and has done for years. I'd read it multiple times. The words of the verse and their order jumped out at me during exams, together with Genesis 39:23 (below). They reminded me that He alone is in control, I have a responsibility to work, to follow His way and trust Him but ultimately He acts. At the time I was reading the story of Joseph and time and time again it is emphasised that it is God who makes the plan succeed. He is repeatedly rescuing and restoring His people.

Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him, and he will act. Psalm 37:5

And whatever he [Joseph] did, the Lord made it succeed. Genesis 39:23

These are my 'verses of the moment'. They are so relevant to me. When I am feeling like I am going to fail (and it is often), these verses make my role clear. I have a responsibility to fulfill the purpose He has made me for (and for me as a medical student that will involve a lot of learning, and time in study) But i also have a responsibility to follow His way and trust Him. He promises if I do that He will act. I have to learn to work more remembering that in this working I am worshipping Him. When i remember this truth my focus improves, i remember that God brought me here, (to medicine a subject i didn't think i was smart enough for) and that with Him i can succeed, made possible because of Him. 


I sat and passed my first university exams. I can truly say the Lord made it succeed! He rescued me when i felt like breaking down and giving up. And now that I am back, at the start of a new semester, with a busier timetable and more to learn, may i keep my focus on Him and not on my worries or inabilities and work for Him and worship Him. 


How much time do we spend frustrated with what we think we cannot do? And how much time do we spend meditating on God's Word declaring that He is the one who makes a plan succeed?! If we spent more time setting this truth in our hearts maybe we would work harder with more passion, and be bolder for Him.


Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ. Colossians 3:23-24

Maggie Murray and my story, my witness

Back in December I had my first unfortunate but privileged experience of attending a friends great-grandmothers funeral. Privileged experience seems like an odd way to describe a funeral, but that is what it was. Maggie Murray was not someone I knew well at all, I even questioned wether or not I'd met her, and hence wether to go. I was scared of turning up and it being awkward, I'd never been to a friends relatives funeral before, and too add to it all Dad would be there which would make it even more strange in my mind. I asked another close friend, she couldn't go and then at dinner while deliberating over it all, I found that Granny was going, I wanted to go I had someone to go with, that was it settled. Then came getting ready. There was a bit of an outfit crisis (since my formal clothes were in Belfast). You'd think being the daughter of a funeral director I'd know how a funeral service goes, no not me! I was worrying about getting money for the offering- there is none. Granny and i headed, me in my interview outfit and Petra's shoes.

My worry about it being awkward faded when the family greeted me by name and connection, I was even thanked for coming. I may not have known Maggie Murray well but what I began to realise throughout the service was that her witness impacted my life. I did not know her personally, but I knew she has impacted my faith. The tribute was special. It taught me several things.

• The importance of not only how i live day by day but how i will live month on month, year upon year and the significance of my full story. I often get caught up in making the right choice, but it made me realise that the story of one live speaks louder than correct decisions and so it should.
• That the relationship you have with one person has much more of an effect than in that persons life alone. 
• I could not have come away from that funeral without having seen how significant family is and how significant the witness to family is. This was a women who made a point of having time for and loving her family; she had 'saturday family soup day', saved sweets and collected 20ps in smarties tubes for the children/grandchildren. I have long respected and admired Leah's parents for how they have share their faith with their children, how they have lived for Christ and how they treat guests like me in their home. I meet Leah shortly after I became a Christian and it was her witness to me in primary school that showed me how to live as a Christian, what difference it really made in my life. I am not ashamed to say at the start i copied Leah. Leah is the closest kind of friend, a lifelong friend who has shared much of herself with me, she has encouraged and challenged my faith and holds me to account. I thank God for her, and her family. I think she would agree that her parents have played a huge role in her salvation and growth as a christian. I am sure Maggie Murray's life has influenced Leah's parents and been a great example for them to follow.

This women was clearly a women of faith. She was in His word daily and a living witness to her family. Her witness was great, it stretched to my life and i do not even claim to know her. I often forget the importance of my witness to my family, I am blessed to live with a Christian family, but living for Christ is much more than simply being saved. My life should be encouraging and challenging my siblings walk with Him, but does it? Am I making enough effort to influence their walk with Christ, to pour love on them and to be an example for them? How will our witness compare to Maggie Murray's? Since writing this, this afternoon i know i have failed. I need to be committed to being a better witness to my family. To end on a brighter note my siblings know more of the person that i was today and that i hope to be more. Let's praise God for His plans of the relationships that help us grow in faith.